A key lesson I learned in law school: never assume. Assumptions get you in trouble, period. This lesson goes hand in hand with those taught by your parents: don’t believe everything you read; don’t judge a book by its cover; don’t trust strangers; look both ways before you cross the street.
Whether it be an article you read or a program you view, keep your perspectives in check. Time and time again, friends have lost arguments with me by stating, “I read it in a magazine somewhere.” After less than five minutes of researching, I was able to dispute what they said: no matter the topic, frivolous or otherwise.
But what ruffles my feathers worst: presumptions about character. If you are a dear friend or a loved one: you know I take great pride in my private life being private and my life organized to the T. Period. To assume that I do not have all my bases covered while running a household, raising a puppy, manicuring my lawn, hauling waste to the dump, and traveling like a maniac, making tons of money for my company, all without the aid of my dearly beloved is, well, outrageous. I got this. More than you know.
So, the next time a reader desires to make a personal comment: email me. Keep it personal. Do not display your presumptions in such a public fashion, for my husband to see and then start to worry. For those of you who know what is like having a husband deployed: the last thing you want them to do is worry. Through this blog, I strive to connect with loved ones far away. If others read it for fodder, so be it. Keep your own fodder.
For those of you who saw said, now-deleted comment, and sent me a personal email regarding its message: thank you. Your respect of my character, life and subsequently, the absence of presumptions conveyed a worthwhile message that put me at ease.
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3 comments:
I'm glad you wrote this. I saw the comment briefly but didn't think to email you about it because it was clear that the poster does NOT know you and how meticulous you are about protecting your loved ones. There seems to be a culture of paranoia among spouses that on one hand is justified by OPSEC, and on the other is completely abused. I hope that whoever she is realizes how misguided and rude she made herself sound by leaving that comment.
I for one, know and trust your judgment and applaud you for handling this so well.
Well said. I also think that even if the commenter was intending to be genuine and concerned (which was not the vibe I got, more of a creepy vibe, but I'm super stranger aware now that I'm in the real world again) they could have approached it in a better way than calling you out on your blog and posting your address for future commenters to see. For someone (the commenter) that seemed to be so concerned for your safety and well-being, they seemed to have completely missed the mark and in doing so, made themselves look foolish.
Good for you for standing up for yourself and your family! I didn't see the comment but I know about presumptions and I am so proud of all that you are doing and how well you are doing while your hubby is away. You are such a strong individual, an inspiration :)
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